Victoria Peace Green

Children's Author * Freelance Writer * Speaker

Category: depression

OUR TWEENS AND TEENS ARE MORE ANXIOUS THAN EVER THESE DAYS

                             

WHAT DID YOU READ about this morning or hear on the radio on your way into work? These days 9 times out of 10 the answer is just NOT GOOD NEWS. No matter what are personal opinions are about today’s world, politics, and the seemingly continued chaos, the news affects your emotions if you are truly honest with yourself. And more so if you are a parent of a middle schooler or high schooler. Our kids take it all in as much as we do but don’t have the years of experiential living to deal with it.

Studies show that their young minds are getting more and more anxiety ridden and most don’t realize this constant barrage of bad news brings on overwhelming symptoms. We parents are in position to defuse or lighten the emotions of our kids. If you could list the top 4 reasons why our teens and middle schoolers are depressed/anxiety ridden what would that list look like? Anything like this one I researched?

Control of the world around them or no control of their own lives adds to depression and anxiety. Lack of control or too much control affects them. Compared to decades past, today’s social issues, diseases, excess of materialism brings on confusion and the feeling that these impressionable youths have no control over their own lives.

Our kids have no free time anymore for real ‘play’ time; good old fashion spending time outside or enjoying family for just being together. Work and school work and the constant trying to catch up – keeps our tweens and teens frustrated and anxiety filled.

Lack of parents taking on their parent responsibility seriously. There may not be a user manual for how to nurture children; but there is HEART and there is RESPONSIBITY! Some parents try to help their kids Continue reading

WHEN BFF’S MOVE AWAY

 

Summertime for tweens is a time of freedom, to re-group and take some time off from school. Close friends are always available with just a phone call away or an invite to spend the night, unless that close friend moves away. Summer has lots of fun but also brings families to relocate due to job transfers and a host of other reasons.

 But our tween’s do not take their relationships casually. They take them deeply! Buddies and BFF’s are a large part of their development. Most people do not like the adjustments that come with moving, but tweens are devastated emotionally when it involves them.

 No matter the personality of your child; shy or gregarious, they all have the same emotions. Having a BFF or a close buddy or two to share their ups and downs and great dreams is powerful security. Many times, family issues bring the unknown or insecurity for tweens, as they do us- so having close friendships with the same interests naturally brings security and safety emotionally. God gives them friends to be their anchor when rough times come at school, with school work, with siblings, loss of a pet, loss of a family member and a just a safe place of coping.

 Helping our tweens through the storms of life such as friends moving or our own tween moving, can be a great way once again for us as parents and grandparents to show them they can lean into us and God.

 One of the hardest things we as parents will do is helping our tween say good-bye. Continue reading

THE LEAFLESS TREE: IT ISN’T DEAD BUT SEEMS TO BE LANGUISHING

            Outside my office window is a giant but very cold-bare crape myrtle. The birds peer into my window as they huddle almost as one life-form on its branches. That tree which was once their hiding place, security from predators, and shelter from the rain, has become unable to do its job any more. The birds don’t wonder like I use to as a kid; is that tree ever going to have leaves again or is it dead?

            Even now as an adult and though I know better, the tree appears as though it is lifeless, just not thriving, or for a better word, languishing. Once it had such vibrancy and purpose as it housed the birds and was admired constantly last spring, summer, and a tad of autumn from my office. I can’t help but see a parallel between that languishing tree and tweens; those kids I love so much. Tween’s find it hard many times to share what hurts, so they often hide or try to under their pretend smiles. Nature has so often, the answers to most of life’s questions. I love how Jesus built the lessons he wanted people to grasp about life and the state of our souls, all around nature. How many of those parables do just that? They make us to wonder about ourselves and seek out those answers. Continue reading

COULD OUR TWEEN BE STRESSED OUT?

 You just tucked your 11 year old into bed for the 3rd time. Its 10:30 pm. suddenly she is standing on the stairs (once again) – “Mom…Mom! ….please let’s go over that math pre-test again! And I just remembered I’m supposed to have my science project in tomorrow!) You hear frustration in her voice (again) and crying. You go to the staircase and look up to find your daughter sitting and sobbing with her face in her knees.  

 Help! This is almost a nightly occurrence – how can we get some normalcy around here?! Why did we not recognize these behaviors- they seemed to suddenly become a constant companion to our tween’s personality.

Most of us adults experience stresses that play out in a number of symptoms. Tween’s also experience this stress when loads of schoolwork, after-school activities bring, chores, friends, and homework, all come at them at once.

When our families go through mega life challenges like divorce, extreme illness and loss of a pet or even moving, our tween’s will many times shut down or become depressed. Even summer months that would seem to bring escape from it all can be stressful as our tween looks at their family holidays (leaving pets and friends behind) and meeting new friends at summer camps, from a suddenly new pre-teen mind.

Balancing these real-life add-ons in their lives and sorting them out in priority will bring anxiety down and a sense of control back into their minds.

Symptoms of Tween stress: Continue reading

The Gift of Attention

Some days seem to never end! From 5:30 am to bedtime can seem like an eternity for many of us as we raise our tween’s.

One tool to cut down on stress and tension amongst the many tools is: Attention!

Quality attention is truly a pearl or a valuable gift given to your tween daily. It is achievable. If quality attention isn’t achievable on a daily basis then our lifestyle needs an adjustment. Attention goes hand in hand with communication. Continue reading