Victoria Peace Green

Children's Author * Freelance Writer * Speaker

Category: roll models

REAL LIFE LESSONS TAUGHT OUR KIDS DURING FAMILY TIMES= VALUES LEARNED

REAL LIFE LESSONS TAUGHT OUR KIDS DURING FAMILY TIMES= VALUES LEARNED

Having a security system is a top priority for many families today. This weekend Thomas and I are installing a security system in our new home! We decided since we have always had one, it was best to purchase one for home. Peace of mind as well as safeguarding our home is a makes this a worthy purchase.

        Our new system has a master or mother board. The components work off of this base. It is a transmitter alarming all the components to do ‘their jobs’. You can go all out and get stuff like sirens/freeze sensor/carbon monoxide detector/glassbreak sensors/panic button/smoke detectors, and the list goes on!   

         I was thinking what a terrific event this would be for a young family. All the conversation, lessons learned, and even values taught could bounce off the installation of a security system! No better way to instill life lessons than to involve your kids in the project!  

          Why do people need security? What is an intruder? Besides a home, how might a person guard their mind and heart? What about the people or friends you hang out with, things you do or possess, places you visit, games you play, and stuff you read? Like the alarm system has a master or mother board and then the various add-ons or components work off them, how can this security system help parents explain the above? Continue reading

YOUR MIDDLE SCHOOLER AND HER CELL PHONE

Cell Phones. If you are a parent of a middle school child, perhaps those two words brings a host of emotional responses. Everything from, “I thank God my kid can be safe with a phone now when he/she is not at home” to …. “What in the world is THIS TEXT I see on my daughter’s phone?! Who would send such a horrible text?” Cell phones, like all social media, are a thing that is here to stay and no matter how we may feel about our kids and CELL PHONES, we need to find a clear and resolute standard for our kids to follow and respect.

When asked what is the most important thing you could have if you were stranded on a desert island, what did pre-teen kids say? A Cell phone! More than any other device or thing!!

Cell phones with the texting and the FACETIME can be like having a host of other parent’s kids in your house that you didn’t invite! Suddenly without warning, you are bombarded with another kid or two (depending on how many kids you have with phones) present and carrying on loud chatter at your table! What is a parent to do about this or about any of the ‘rude nesses’ that kids think are “just life and normal”?  How about some rules? After all, freedoms without rules is chaos and not what parents want to mirror or consent to.

Identify all people texting your kid. If you don’t have time to check each one, then you are not being a responsible parent. Your kid should expect a loving and protective parent to do such.  Being involved is love. Continue reading

WHAT ROLE MODELS DO YOUR KIDS HAVE?

Children imitate behavior.It’s that easy. Most of us can remember the few adults in our lives which had great influence. Remember the not-so- good ones? Some of those role models many of us are still trying to forget! But healthy role models challenged us and encouraged us like no one else. We wanted to be like them. They helped us come to places of great decision- the ones that affected the outcome of our lives.

Of course the most obvious first role models for any child are us parents and then grandparents, aunts, uncles, older cousins and of course teachers! What is healthy in modeling behavior? If we smoke, drink, swear, gossip, or just sit around and watch TV- it’s very likely our kids will do the same. We can preach all about not doing those things but if we do them- well, I remember my mother would advise me but if I saw her do what was the opposite or be a hypocrite- then all was lost! Continue reading

Power-Words To Feed Our Kid’s Hearts and Minds- 24/7

I was at the grocery store the other day. I don’t like grocery stores. Just too chaos and too many choices to make…. so I enjoy studying any kids and their parents that are also engaged in each other and  in the experience of shopping. I decided after cleaning my cart with those wipe things to make a study on what I heard between kids and adults.

Moms and some dads were hustling around with kids in tow or in the carts. I listened as if I had no eyes. In fact in places where it was safe to do so, I closed my eyes as I heard ‘conversation’ between adults and children. I wanted to cry. Why? The parents talked at their kids not with their kids, the kids nagging, nagging for whatever reason, then the big shouting match telling the kids “NO” only to be followed with more nagging. I have to say the bazar habit of parents talking or texting on their phones, while they are supposed to be choosing groceries and being attentive to their children, has got to be the most unrecognized neglectful adult behavior. What are they teaching their kids while they do this? Uhhhh…..for starters, how about its OK to ignore those you are with. And they learn to do the same thing with their own friends and family !

 IMAGINE OUR KIDS AS GROWN UP KIDS 

 I asked myself, if all these kids were grown up and walking beside their parent how the conversations would be different? We ought to try walking at the store or anywhere with our kids and imagining they are adult kids. Or we might pretend that sweet 3 foot tall child is our own friend we enjoyed a bite to eat with at the lunch hour today.

Continue reading

SHAUN WHITE- A WINNER IN HIS CONVICTIONS

Who is your Olympic all-time hero? Can you remember when you were a kid following an Olympian or a sports figure?  Today as I write this, Shawn White took center stage literally on TV. He was the favorite this year to take home to the USA gold in not one but two sports, the slopestyle and the halfpipe. His announcement to withdraw from the very popular slopestyle was a shock to most of the world. But then as the news settled, Shaun’s decision worked for him in a big way. He won. He won in the minds and hearts of many parents that have kids who looked up to him …and still do.

 I am so grateful for the world of tweens and just kids in particular to see a valuable lesson.

 Shaun said amongst other sound words, “….the potential for risk of injury is a bit too much for me to gamble my other Olympic goals.” This spoken by the most decorated athlete to ever compete in the snowboarding events.
I see a clear message from Shaun: it’s OK to work hard and give your all to your sport or work, but then make a decision (not based on what you think others might want to hear), but on your own personal convictions. He sized up the way the Russians set up the event and after much agonizing deliberations inside his own mind and heart, he realized that he might get hurt; really hurt. Though he knew it was going be a tough one he followed through because he wanted to concentrate on the other goal without compromising himself; losing out on both or hurting his wrist even more than it was hurt.
Continue reading

WHAT IN THE WORLD IS MY TWEEN ASKING ME?

           The other day I was in a huge hurry so I thought I’d save time in one of those 15 or less check outs at the grocery store. But my impatience suddenly calmed down when I heard two moms in front of me sharing. One mom said her 12 year old wanted to know what she (her mom) would do if she got pregnant! The friend wasn’t shocked; she just came back with her own experience last week. She laughed and then got real serious- looking, then told her friend that her 11 year old daughter was sick and tired of us (her mom and dad) making her do her homework before she was allowed  to talk to her friends on her cell phone.

Not sure about you, but cell phones in an 11 year olds hands – might be a recipe for a “disconnect” between daughter and mom (?) These days tweens are not what they were in “those days”- the mom’s days. If we can just remember “those days” when we were tween’s and what came out of our wild and crazy minds and mouths!  But these days, tween’s know all about sex, drugs, pornography, alcohol, and all the rest because of the media of TV and all the techie stuff parents allow their kids to own which connects them to the internet! These two moms are about to lose control of parenting their sons and daughters unless they stay savvy and connected with them on a daily basis. Continue reading

OUR KIDS/GRANDS AND THEIR DECISIONS- THEY NEED HELP YET MORE RESPONSIBILITY AS THEY MATURE

OUR KIDS AND THEIR DECISIONS – THEY NEED HELP AND YET RESPONSIBILITY

Without thinking we make many a day, an hour, and minute by the minute. I was thinking this morning when I made the decision to get up and plant my feet on the floor, how many decisions I would make today that might be observed.

Our kids, our grand’s, our nieces and nephews, our students, neighbor kids, and perfect little strangers in the grocery isle will be watching us grown-ups as we speak and act! Wow- that is something to think about or at least it is for me.  I’m not talking about huge decisions (in this particular blog) that are planned like where to put our money; 401K or savings elsewhere.  It’s those everyday little ones that make a long range difference in the lives of those little eyes and ears watching me. The question I ask myself is how can I be a good model today?

Honestly I make it my priority daily (though I fail time and time again) to ask the Lord to help me make those wise and productive decisions in my own daily life at home first. My priority’s, the types of books, entertainment, hobbies, and even the way I move and act and be in my relationships  need to be overshadowed with the Lord’s direction and perspective each of my days or I am a mess!  I made it simple a few years back; when I choose to follow what God likes then I can’t go wrong in the eyes of my grand kids or any little eyes around my neighborhood that might meet up with me. My accountability partner I like to think is ………God. Continue reading

Mom! What Are You Doing Washing My Shirt?!!

What our tweens wear to school tops their MOST IMPORTANT list of “how not be embarrassed”.  Have you ever experienced the old “toilet-paper-getting –stuck-to-your- heel just after using the restroom in a board meeting?  Or how about the time you gave your power-point presentation with your fly open or your blouse buttons popped off?

It all comes down to what is important at the time or the season or phase of life. Our preteen or tween has immense insecurities about fitting in or being a part of the pack. They would rather die than wear something that NO BODY ever wears to school!  

Could the more pertinent issue be: how much do we spend on this tug-of-war with our tween’s or does it even need to be a war? Giving too much attention to what they can and can’t wear may bring less attention from what really matters in middle school- good grades. So the question haunts our brains as we stare at our daughter’s choice of skirts and too much skin showing or our son’s strange way to wear his pants: 

At what point does a new law need to be written on their foreheads about their   choice of clothes? Continue reading

The Gift of Attention

Some days seem to never end! From 5:30 am to bedtime can seem like an eternity for many of us as we raise our tween’s.

One tool to cut down on stress and tension amongst the many tools is: Attention!

Quality attention is truly a pearl or a valuable gift given to your tween daily. It is achievable. If quality attention isn’t achievable on a daily basis then our lifestyle needs an adjustment. Attention goes hand in hand with communication. Continue reading

A NEW SCHOOL YEAR BEGINS – MIXED EMOTIONS

August brings the end of summer vacation. And with the end of summer brings mixed emotions that begin to plague kids. Some kids can hardly wait to pick out their back-pack and a few new clothes and wait for that school bell to chime (or buzz in some cases!). However, there other kids that begin to bite their nails, get stomach aches, act up, and just plain become anxious about the thought of school. 

A bullying  experience might be part of the problem-  even one instance can change a child from a extrovert to introvert. And from a confident child to an anxious/insecure child.

Many parents might see their anxious / nervous child as a bewildering challenge. They have no idea in many cases that a a bullying experience even occurred. But no matter the reason for this change in behaviors; from being confident to being worried and upset,  moms and dads have a great opportunity to comfort and reassure their child. Continue reading